THIS IS REFERRING TO THE BOOK I HAVE TOLD YOU ABOUT. DAD

My daughter-in-law was killed by lightening 15 months ago while climbing the Grand Tetons. She left behind two babies, a boy almost two and a girl who had her fourth birthday the week before. Many have given theories and tried to explain this tragedy. None of them are very comforting. The hardest part is knowing that these two little ones will never be physically loved and held by her again. They are too little to grieve, yet they really do miss their mommy. I have to say that she was the best mother, spent every minute with these kids and loved them and giggled with them and was patient and good. She put a whole lot of living and loving in the short time she was here on earth. Her death was tragic, sudden, and doesn't make sense. But then, I realize that I only have a mortal point of view. My son and his friends placed a memorial on the mountain that said, "Touched by God." That is the most comforting statement of all.  
A book that gives us great comfort is The Message by Lance Richardson, who just happened to live in my son's ward. He died a few months after Erica. I've come to believe his promise that our loved ones who have died are still very close to us.  I think that they are our guardian angels. My daughter said the one thing that made the most sense, "These two little ones must have a challenging life ahead of them if Erica can help them more as a spiritual mother than as a mortal mother."
My son's faith has remained unshaken. He is living a good life with a new wife, who is wonderful to my grandchildren. My question now is, How much do we keep Erica's memory alive? Or is better for the kids to get on with a new life? Is it okay to teach them that their mom will always be close by?  My inclination is to grieve forever; the pain doesn't seem to lessen with time. I hurt so much for them. But I think the very young kids are more resilient than the adults. They are able to get on with life in a happy, positive way. I just want to love them and be there for them as only a grandma can.    –  Grandma Packer, Rigby, ID

You sound like a wonderful grandmother, and I’m so glad the children, and your son, are surrounded by so much love.  I believe the best approach is to help your children keep Erica’s memory alive all that you can.  She has not ceased to exist; she has only gone ahead of them.  It’s certainly okay to teach them that their mom is still close by; what a comfort, in fact.  Maybe they could celebrate her birthday each year, look through scrapbooks and pay tribute.  Bringing her up now and again, in a loving way (“Oh, you have the same gorgeous singing voice your mom had!” “I wonder what your mom would do in this situation; she was always so wise…”) is both healthy and needed. This won’t prevent them from loving their new step-mom; but will cement all their bonds of love.

NOTE: I THINK THAT THE COMMENT ABOUT A CHALLENGING LIFE REFERS TO THE AGE OF THE KIDS. THIS SHOULD BE A HUGE COMFORT TO ALL OF US.
YOU ALL KNOW YOUR MOM. JUST TRY TO IMAGINE HOW YOUR MOM WILL WANT TO HELP YOU.
I WILL TELL YOU WHEN I AM IN THE TEMPLE I FEEL THE CLOSEST TO HER. IN FACT WHEN I AM THERE EVERYTHING FEELS ALRIGHT.

LOVE YOU

DAD